I’m Sorry, He’s Sorrier.

Genesis 6:5-8

New Living Translation (NLT)

The Lord observed the extent of human wickedness on the earth, and he saw that everything they thought or imagined was consistently and totally evil. So the Lord was sorry he had ever made them and put them on the earth. It broke his heart. And the Lord said, “I will wipe this human race I have created from the face of the earth. Yes, and I will destroy every living thing—all the people, the large animals, the small animals that scurry along the ground, and even the birds of the sky. I am sorry I ever made them.” But Noah found favor with the Lord.



Wow. This passage really creates lots of thoughts in my mind. Like I asked in a previous post, Does God feel regret? I thought He has everything planned out? It’s all part of a greater plan right? But here, its like, He didn’t expect this. He didn’t see this coming. Is that possible? Or maybe His heart broke but He knew that true love can only come this way. True Love can only come by choice. It’s not love if God just forced our hearts to love Him and do good right? He gave us a perfect will, perfect power to choose. So did He know this was coming? Hmmm. Probably, but this was the price to pay for love?

Hmm. I’m not sure if this explains what I’m thinking.

What do you guys think?


Second thought. I want to be like Noah. He and his family was spared and chosen. I want to be part of that team. Team Holy. 




Finding You

Where’s Waldo?


you know who i think is the HARDEST person to find?

i’ve tried and tried,

but i realised that the hardest person to find is myself.


sometimes people look up to me and say, hey you’ve got things figured out, you know where you’re headed, you understand the fundamentals of life.

but hey honestly,

i don’t.


too often i’ve asked:

Lord, what am i doing? why am i doing this? 

what am i doing wrong? what didn’t i do right?


sometimes i look into myself and i feel lost.

i try to find something, but all i get is a big question mark.

and i don’t even know what the question is.


I guess that all my life i’ve been looking for myself in the wrong places.

who i am is not found in what i do.

who i am is not out there in the world.

who i am is not found in my friends or community.

who i am is not found in my family.

i cant even find out who i am by looking into myself!


i guess my identity, life, goals, and dreams, skills, character, and future, has to be found somewhere else then.

somewhere more divine and uncomprehendable.


yes, that’s the only place where i will be able to really find myself.



Busy Week

Sorry Guys


havent really updated because i dont really have time.

1. i’m rushing on my assignments.

2. i’m editing my church youth ministry dance song for christmas performance.

3. i just came back from a planning retreat yesterday.

4. there’s a youth camp tomorrow. (so more stuff to prepare)


hope you guys forgive me!

God bless you all!


tomorrow is danielle’s birthday!

i got a present for her but… u know.

its cheap and simple, so i dunno if she’ll appreciate it haha.

oh wells.



so lemme end on a funny note.



Chosen Ones



we are God’s chosen ones.

just like the Israelites.

God gave so much to them.

blessing upon blessings.

mercy and grace upon mercy and grace.

but He also commands them to obey Him.

these days i’m reading of a time when the Israelites have disobeyed God one too many times.

even after warnings.


it reminds me of someone.


i have been chosen.

i been given blessings upon blessings.

yet, i fail to grasp the ultimate holiness that i’m supposed to reflect in my life.

how do i reflect Jesus if i am the way i am in public?

how do i reflect Jesus if i am the way i am in private?


i keep wondering why these Israelites just fail to obey God.

it’s so so clear that they should.

yet, they don’t see it.

then i reflect on myself.

i’m not a bad example of a weak human myself.



Some Old Thoughts

Blogging Money


so i did have a few thoughts to write about today,

and i cant help but think that i do blog quite a lot.

i like to share my thoughts.

though its very messy, but i like doing it.

and there are people who genuinely enjoy reading my thoughts.


so today, i was thinking:

why dont i register for those ads program where i can earn extra income (even if its a few cents per month).

i can put ads on my blog.


i update often.


problem is,

with xanga FREE i cant do it! NOOOOO

if i pay for Xanga Premium then yes i can.


but its quite expensive.


migrate my blogging work to wordpress or blogger.


should I?

i feel so attached to this one.






lots of us dont like to ask ‘why’ at the right time.

this is because we tend to be afraid to look into ourselves to dig out real reasoning.

last week during prayer meeting, my senior pastor asked the whole group of about 20 people:

Why are you here in prayer meeting?

and she asked us to be honest.

dont just give really holy “politically (or religiously correct)” answers.

my answer is too simple.

you know my answer, i’ve shared this last time in a post of random thoughts.

i want to learn to really pray. and the best place to do it is with people who have a great prayer heart and fire.


my question to you:

Why do you go to church?

Why do you believe in what you believe in?






so in my previous post of the same title Leader,

i talked about how a pastor was thinking of training a leader based on what he saw a boy do.

stack the chairs and clean up.


well, some of you know that i myself am a leader in my church youth group.

funny thing is,

i had NO capabilities whatsoever at that time.

i was not great with leadership skills, i wasnt good in relating with people,

i hated confronting people, i was pretty happy-go-lucky (not as responsible as i should at my age),

i liked to make jokes at inappropriate times, and i disliked being on stage or in the spot light.

and i wasnt even CLOSE to SMART.

but one thing about me is that i just wanted to be there to help.

i wanted to serve.

i remember being so proud of myself because in my schools Christian Fellowship Club,

i attended every single meeting, i attended every prayer meeting,

and i wasnt even a leader of post in the club.

i was a no one.

even the leaders and the committee members skipped at least once.

anyways i was picked to be a leader because of my commitment.

and i loved my God.

easy as that.



Who gets to be leader?

The one who is comfortable under pressure?

the one who is comfortable in the spot light?

the one who is comfortable giving orders?

the one comfortable loving others?

mind boggling.






Did you notice that i dislike selling an idea to people?

i did.

i dont like it when my Amway friends keep trying to sell me their product.

i said no bro.

i dont like it when my dad keeps reminding me about prayer meeting.

i said im going bro.

you know, its not whether i agree with you or not,

its just that you’re a bugger.

this is EXACTLY why i hear SOOO SOOO MUCH about why people don’t go to church.

they have no problem with Jesus.

they have problems with the christians.

what stuck up little humbugs we really are.


i have no solutions to this.

maybe we need to be less annoying.

maybe we need to be less proud, then they might trust our words more.

maybe we need to live a more fruitful life, be a living proof.

maybe we need to talk less.

maybe we need to sit back and let God do his thang.

i dunno.


what do you think we should do to stop SELLING our religion??




To My Readers


been getting more visits these days.


i see people still like to read.

thats awesome news!

i hope i continue to entertain, educate, and inspire!

(if possible lol)



Lets Get Back On Track


so about a month ago my church had an invited guest speaker for our service.

i forgot who it was actually. hehe.

i DO remember something the pastor said.

the story went something like this.

lets make the pastor a he, because i think i remember the pastor being a man haha.

he has a big church.

(he was telling us about how God moved and the church grew)

so they had a big youth service.

and they had a great youth service.

at the end of the service,

they all left as usual.

one stayed back to pack up.

stack the chairs and tidy the place up.

in a meme the pastor might’ve thought

Faith in humanity restored“.

but instead the pastor said, this is the one person i would train to be a leader.

i was thinking, this guy didnt show any leadership qualities,

how did the pastor think of him being a leader?


but what good is a leader with no servanthood heart?

what good is a leader that has no love?

a good leader needs to love God and love people.

and i think a servanthood heart is a manifestation of that.

and come to think of it,

what good is ANYONE as ANYTHING if you do not love God and people?


this is a good test.

you can use this to test people.

very effective way to gauge your friends hearts.


it is also a good test for yourself.