It’s Me

Hi, it’s me again. Of course it’s me, who else can it be? I’m feeling tired. More tired than I usually feel. Gosh. Weight.

“Learn To Prioritize, Then Teach It To The Youths”

Joey is a super busy lady. I told Joey to learn to prioritize, then teach it to the youths. There was a quiet pause for a few seconds. Then she laughed.

I knew that laugh all too well. I knew what she was thinking. Cuz I was thinking it too. It’s not gonna happen.

Not that I look down on her. Just that, it’s the same for me too. These days, youths are too busy being busy. There is too much to prioritize. We have too many important things to do. We have too many urgent things to do. We also have too many unimportant things to do. Too much entertainment to catch up with. Some entertainment these days even REQUIRE our constant attention, or even DAILY attention. Oh my goodness. We used to control how we entertain ourselves. How the tides have turned.

Entertainment is laughing at you.

I’m laughing at you. I’m laughing at me.

I’m angry at myself.

Love Is Rare

But it shouldn’t be.

 

Have you noticed that love is rare in your life? Don’t blame the people close to you. You’re the problem. You need to start changing the way you view people and act toward people. End of story. Love is a choice. Love is action. Take action. Don’t let love be rare.

You’re the problem.

I’m the problem.

Do something about it. Love freely.

Her feet go down to death; her steps take hold on hell.

Proverbs 5:5

 

 

 

Lecrae – Killa

 

Uh,
I know it’s going to kill me but I just can’t let it go
And the taste so appealing got a grip upon my soul
These honey dip lies mesmerize me
Pride’s got its crooked fingers twisted all inside in me
Fools walk the path I’m on, never to be seen again
Sipping on seduction while we eating on some secret sin
(Not a lot of love and mercy) says the whisper in my ear
And I know I should be over this, but I ain’t seeing clear
And I aint leaving here, unless somebody save me
Walking to my grave letting evilness enslave me
Evil looks so lovely covered in her lace of lies
And the silky smooth seduction just manipulates my mind
Her fabrical fabrication is fueling my fascination
While I’m intoxicated she starts her assassination
I’m losing all my honor and my years to the merciless
Giving all my life away but I’m just so immersed in this (killa)

Baby this is innocent (Killa) it won’t even hurt a little bit (Killa)
I’m only here for your benefit (killa) I’m your every wish (Killa)
Come on and let me in (killa), baby this is innocent (Killa)

And it won’t even hurt a little bit (Killa) Close your eyes and let’s get lost tonight
(Killa) Would it be alright? You’ll see (killa)
Her feet go down to DEATH, so don’t let her consume you
Even though her heart is black, her exterior’s beautiful
She’ll take your life away, strip away your joy
Pretends that she gon build you up but she’s just gon destroy you
My friends fell low, when they was so high
Got me running scared of myself, no lie
And I know I’m gon die, I tried cold turkey
But when I’m feeling worthy, Satan’s sure trying to merk me
I’m doing myself dirty, flirting with whats perverted
I should follow the word but I guess I’d rather be murdered
Excuse me I mean martyred ’cause I’m killing myself
My sin conceived a baby, and we gon name it death, breath
(Gasps) -Taker, she take my breath away
Replaces it with poison and I’m so swept away
I need some prayer today hope I wake up
Before they start my wake up somebody make me break up
I’m dating a (Killa)
Baby this is innocent (Killa) it won’t even hurt a little bit (Killa)
I’m only here for your benefit (killa) I’m your every wish (Killa)
Come on and let me in (killa), baby this is innocent (Killa)

Helpless

I’ve always thought myself as a compassionate person. I have a heart easily broken when I get to know people and find out what they’re struggling with. My natural instinct is to ask, what can I do? Every time I’ve gone to the villages of interior Sabah, my heart breaks. My view of life changes. I imagine what I can do to help. I pray for them when I remember them. I am a compassionate guy.

Or so I thought. Psalm 35: 13 gives a glimpse of how much David cared for his friends. But when they were sick, my clothing was sackcloth; I humbled my soul with fastings; and my prayer returned into my own bosom. This reminds me of all the times I have forgotten to pray for a friend who asked me to remember him/her in prayer. Because David changed his life to mourning to mourn for his friends. I don’t change my life just for a friend. Even when I’m heartbroken, I do not open my wallet and give money. ‘Logic’ overtakes me. Or, I just don’t have that love that we can see David has. Compassion is a trait birthed from love.

Compassion is not a feeling when you wanna cry for someone. Compassion is not imagining yourself in someones shoes. Compassion is a sorrow birthed from love.

God felt this compassion for you. For me. The helpless state we were born in, and delved in deeper as we lived. The trap. The pit. The hopelessness. There’s nothing we can do to free ourselves. God had compassion because He loves us. He WANTS to save us from that pit. With true love and true compassion comes action. Even the most difficult action is worth it. Because that is love. Because that is compassion. Because that is God.

He loves me

He loves you. He saved you.